Welcome to Demelza Therapy
Supporting people as they navigate the tricky waters of transition
From new countries to new communities; new careers with new commutes; new babies, or new bodies through surgery or the menopause. New seasons come in all shapes and sizes, each with their own new challenges and opportunities.
A quote I love by Desmond Tutu is “Hope is being able to see that there is light, despite all the darkness.” I value this perspective as it doesn’t try to pretend that the darkness in the world isn’t real: but it does point to the power of hope. New seasons bring new opportunities and amid all the tricky feelings of uncertainty, hope can be found. Hopes that were once lost can be reclaimed and new hopes discovered.
New life seasons are full of uncertainty. A limbo-land. It can be really unsettling to have to rethink how you are in the world. What your values and priorities are now in this new context. Often there is a real longing for a sense of belonging; yet there is also a push against the pressure to perform and perfect to fit in. And in all this are some big questions.
Questions that can fill us with the fear that will be overwhelmed, and we will drown.
But as an intimate team, we can swim to safety. Together we can explore what these questions mean to you in this season of your life. Think and feel our way through your story and all its unique complexities and help you integrate yourself in a place of greater authenticity. A place where you can be more fully known and accepted just as you are. A place where your sense of internal resilience is stronger, more confident that you will find the resources within you withstand the storms of life.
And from this place feel released into living out your values and finding purpose in the pain. Increase your access to your more creative self. Grow your sensitivity to the physical world and openness to spiritual moments of connection with God, others and nature. Empower you to feel more freedom to relax and relish being alive.
I have over 10 years experience working in the charity sector with Humanitarian Aid Workers; debriefing them after critical incidents and providing support as they transition back to life in the UK. I love this work passionately as it combines my training in International Development, with the power of working at relational depth. My Masters in Social Development gave me great insight into the macro issues that hinder wellbeing for societies: combined with my therapy training that empowers me to empathize how those injustices play out at a personal level. I feel well equipped to support my clients to finding hope in even the darkest of places.
Being part of team of people working towards social justice is important to me both in my professional and personal life. As a therapist I have worked for the Crossroads Counselling service in Tower Hamlets in London, working with those on on low incomes. I counselled women in Holloway Prison with child loss issues and have provided short term (12 weeks) therapy as part of Wandsworth Bereavement Service. I deeply value the creativity of play therapy and therefore have volunteered at CARIS Islington a service providing support for bereaved children.
I chose to train be a Counsellor at The Minster Centre in London as it is one of the longest established and leading Integrative Psychotherapy and Counselling training institutions in Europe. I wanted to ensure I was as robustly trained as possible in order to be as resilient as possible for my clients.
We all experience times in our lives that push us to re-examine how we see ourselves, are values and how we want to respond to the challenges life presents. Through talking together we will explore your story, working to gain a better understanding of what you’ve been through and where you want to grow. Having a space to this that is confidential and feels safe means you give yourself the chance to see things from fresh perspective and make meaningful choices for you and those you love.
I trained as an Integrative Therapist. This means I have a range of different tools that I use strategically for you as an individual; mind, body, feelings and spirit. Counselling isn’t about giving you solutions or advice, but empowering you to make your own changes.
I am quite creative and enjoy developing metaphors that become a short hand between us of understanding. Our joint discovery of what makes you tick, mean that we grow to notice your patterns, the feelings you find hard to allow yourself to feel, the things you're willing to fight for, and the things that light up your soul. This way of working helps you to examine your life and make new strategic choices.
Doing this journey with my clients is one of the greatest privileges of my life and I am deeply grateful for all they share with me.
Counseling is a safe space, just for you. A space where you can come and enjoy the freedom from social conventions on whose turn it is to talk! It is a space where you get to bring your thoughts and feelings; confident you will be met with empathy and sensitivity just as you are.
Adapting to a new life circumstance can be a tricky time; full of uncertainties that can trigger a sense of anxiety. These new challenges can cause us to feel a loss of direction or purpose. Talking to a trained professional helps us make sense of those challenging times and offers a way through them, moving towards a better understanding of ourselves and our feelings.
Working together I can help you gain greater insight into the difficulties you are facing, help you understand why you act or react to them the way you do, and see how you can start to make better, heathier choices moving forward.
Counselling sessions for individual adults last 50 minutes, usually taking place on a weekly basis via Zoom, and cost £60 per session. I also provide a limited number of spaces for those on low-income or for students; contact me to enquire about availability. Initial assessment appointments last around 80 minutes. I do offer a free 20 introductory call to give you a chance to ask any questions you might have and check our availability matches.
Note that if you want to cancel an appointment I require two weeks; otherwise you will still need to pay for any sessions missed. I accept payment in Paypal or by bank transfer.
Counselling is usually a good way to help with a current problem; something that can be discussed and - hopefully - resolved within a limited number of sessions. Over a certain number of weeks the understanding of the problem improves and away forward becomes clear. Therapy often describes work that goes a bit deeper, towards more substantial life issues and problems having a deeper effect on the client’s life. Therapy often requires a long-term approach, so the number of sessions can be open-ended.
Which option is most suitable depends on the client and the difficulties they are facing. In some cases counselling works well as an ongoing, longer-term option - or therapy can manage to resolve an issue in just a few sessions.
How long a period of counselling lasts will vary from person to person and depend on the depth of the issues they are facing. For some people a couple of sessions helps to bring their problems into focus, and they feel ready to move forward; other problems may require more of an open-ended approach.
Before we begin any work we will agree on the number of sessions we’ll undertake, and at the end of that number review our progress. As long as we both agree further therapy will be of benefit to you, sessions can continue.
My aim is to offer a first appointment - known as an initial assessment - within 1-2 weeks. Then we would arrange a set number of counselling sessions to take place at the same time every week, that is convenient for you and where I have availabity. How quickly these sessions can begin will depend on the availabity of that free ‘slot’.
Everything that is said within the counselling room is private - this is one of the main ways counselling and therapy differ from talking to a friend or relative. Once you are comfortable with the format of weekly sessions and the safe space they provide, you will find the freedom to speak in confidence is of great value.
Note that there are some situations where you may be a risk to yourself or others, and there the law requires that I notify an authority; in these cases I may not be able to keep total confidentiality. Breaking confidentiality is very rare though, and only happens after the person concerned has been informed.
Usually I am asked this question by people who are nervous about entering into counselling, or when they are looking for support in coming to see a therapist. This anxiety is understandable, but a key aspect of therapy is that you should feel free to talk about any issues you feel are important to you. Having someone else with you who can be connected those issues makes this opening-up more difficult, so for this reason I do not see clients accompanied by friends or family.